"adoptable +Candy+" by xXVanillaVodkaXx

Adoptable characters seem to be big business nowadays. Internet artists doodle up a bunch of multicoloured wolves or Sonics or Renamons, and people who want to be friends with the artist pay them real money for the right to say that one of the little rainbow Sonics/Renamons/wolves is their own. It's a crazy phenomenon, and providing an example of it today is artist xXVanillaVodkaXx.

That's right, for money dollars you could own your very own scantily-clad, bow-legged Sonic-slut. Complete with partially-visible-bikini-bottoms and three-foot-long eyelashes!

I'm not sure what's keeping those daisy dukes attached to her waist - it feels like this is a photo of the moment before they tumbled down to her ankles. Not to her feet, though. Those are hard to draw.

"ANTHRO KimmyKat Matryoshka" by xxMidnightTigerxx

Our latest piece is by artist xxMidnightTigerxx, and apparently features a character named Kimmy.

I'LL BITE OFF YOUR COCK

Holy shit. Well. I mean, let's be honest - that's the face of a rapist right there. Two of them, in fact, if you notice the creepy look the hood of her jacket is giving to you.

It's difficult to get along to subjects like the oversized head or invisible hands or muscular neck because every time I catch the gaze of those eyes I freeze like a deer on a highway. Jesus, I need to go and lie down.

"Rose ate Star" by shadevore

It's been a while - there have been tears, laughs and lessons learned - and now it's time to make fun of more horrible internet art. God bless us, every one. Today's sacrifice to the altar is piece "Rose ate Star" by artist shadevore.


I wonder which parts of this image shadevore made! The background blends so well with the characters I'm inclined to believe this was all the work of one person, toiled over for hours under the light of the moon.

The expression that sun is making is similar to the one I made when I read the dialogue in this piece. "Why has green Renamon trapped that blue goth Knuckles in a purple sphere? She says it is her belly, but I do not believe her."

"ArchibkuroXTaeyddi Very Much" by TheGreedGirl

Holy shit you guys! I just learned how to use the airbrush tool! I need to use this thing as much as possible so I can become the airbrush master!


Shit, now I've overdone it and everyone looks like creepy glass statues. That was not my original intention! Oh well, I guess I'll stick it on DeviantArt.

This image is horrible, I don't care who argues. God could try to defend this shit and I would disagree. I can barely tell what the fuck is going on through all the white, it's like two otters covered themselves in paint and then rolled in cocaine.

"music is my life" by Mirppe

We haven't really been appealing much to the gay werewolf demographic recently, so I am legally obliged to share the following piece by artist Mirppe.


"The most beautiful thing in my life is Music. ." Really? The most beautiful thing? Someone sure needs a girlfriend. Or boyfriend, judging by that haircut. Thanks for adding the iPod logo too - this image wasn't quite shallow enough without it.

Here's a fun game to play with this image - measure the size of the dog's head with your thumb and forefinger, then move your hand down and compare it to the size of his SUPER MUSCULAR waist. That's one top-heavy canine right there.

"There are diamonds In the SKY" by Mr-MellowSmile

It's not every day you see a dog enjoy the effects of drug consumption. Today artist Mr-MellowSmile has given us a rare and precious sight to see.


Look at that huge, lopsided smile... those glazed, unfocused eyes... the way it's tilting to the left a bit too far... this dog is having a whale of a time. He's all like, "why the fuck am I wearing a scarf? You guys I'm so high right now, where did this scarf even come from"

Maybe it was drugs that made the artist too lazy to do a proper background and they had to resort to slapping colours about. Who knows.

"the mansion 20" by Apokol

I thought I was done adding entries for today, but sometimes you just find something that's too good to pass up. Today's lucky provider is artist Apokol.


WHY IS SHE HOLDING AN ENORMOUS PAIR OF TITS WITH ANIME EYES.

Seriously even for fetishist shit this is weird beyond words. What the hell do I comment with? Those sure are some disgruntled-looking disembodied anime tits! I wonder if they talk through the nipples.

Y'know, usually I try to keep these choices completely out of context and stick with just what was on the front page, but fuck it. I'm gonna go back a page and find out what caused this shit. We're going maverick.


OH WELL THAT EXPLAINS EVERYTHING.

I wish someone would tell these creepy fetishists about, y'know... tits only lactating when there's a babby to feed. Though a woman did just turn into a giant pair of bongos with anime eyes so I guess biology is the least of this crazy motherfucker's concerns!

"Sue naga comic page 1" by SmexySue

So, we're all friends here right? How about we share a quick hit of some bizarrely-drawn wish-fulfilment porn? No? Come on guys, SmexySue has already drawn it!


I don't know what it is about vore-fetishists and nagas (half-snake people). They seem to show up an awful lot to monch people down. Maybe it's because it's an excuse for them to be able to swallow huge things, even though they don't have the skeletal structure of a snake so that wouldn't...

I'm overthinking. Three big-titted eye-burningly-brightly-coloured Sonics are chilling out at the beach and another, horribly-sunburnt snake-Sonic creeps towards them licking her lips. I'm glad there's no more. I can just pretend she wants to steal their picnic basket.

Look at those tits. Is she rubbing her hands together in fiendish delight or is she just trying to hold those fuckers up? The mind boggles.

"Toferette and the gloves 6" by ShineofRain

Ladies and gentlefolk it is time to get our rocks off to some absurd fetish porn. Artist ShineofRain kindly donates today's example!


God damn, that's some lazy MSPaint shit. What is it about having an obscure fetish that makes your standards of porn drop so dramatically? Sex is great but if someone presented me with a shitty MSPaint rendition of it and told me to whack off to it I'd tell them it just couldn't be done.

Anyway, this furry dog-woman seems to have inflated for some reason and that makes her talk like a twat. "I can't feel my feet nor the ground as well" she complains boredly. Then she falls over or something - purely a speculation, since I can see that lovingly added in sound effect there declaring FALLING NOISE.

Maybe next time ShineofRain should try making an UNINSTALLING MSPAINT noise.

"In the Bracken" by lorddarke

It is about time we got sci-fi sexy up in here, with the assistance of artist lorddrake. Bring in the titties!


Even by female fantasy armour standards, that outfit is pretty ridiculous. You're going to have to go through the link and check out the close-up to see, but those things on her tits? They're coils of wire that wrap around the rat-woman's erect nipples.

Why? What's the purpose? If her nipples are un-erect do they drop off and get lost in the foliage?

Nipple-wire aside, this is some bizarre shit. Imagine having to describe this image to someone who had never seen it without any visual aids. "There's a big-titted mostly-naked rat woman and a scary-faced horse man walking through a forest with future-guns?"

"Sass" by Dixie-Emo

I feel unwell all of a sudden. It may have been the late lunch I had... or the hot chocolate... or it might be the creepy dog man hovering over me, shirtless, gnawing off one of his own fingers.


You've really got to see this one in close-up to appreciate the true horrors; the way he's biting down just a bit too hard on his finger, the way his body shrinks into a withered husk the further down you look... the way he's clutching determinedly onto the crotch of his shiny purple pants...


What the hell is that? Is he holding an Easter egg there? Buddy, your genitals should not look like that, even if you are a creepy goblin dog man.

"Umbreon in Colors" by Lucario1759

Hello ladies, are you here for the gun show? Today's act is courtesy of artist Lucario1759.


That's one... big package, right there. Is it safe to assume that this fella has a balloon for a cock? His crotch is awfully bloated and shiny. Then again, the rest of him is pretty similar so maybe it's just a balloon suit with a tiny Pokemon sitting inside.

I can't stop staring at that tiny animal head on top of that huge probably-traced man body. It's like putting a tiny bunny head on a wrestler - it's crazy. Is this meant to be attractive?

I can understand this being made humorously but... seriously?

"Arabian Sonic Girls" by DarkArtistKaiser

The artist's comment for this piece begins with the words "Oooooooh god where to start..." and I honestly couldn't agree more with artist DarkArtistKaiser. Where on earth DO I start with this.


It would be difficult to find a worse example of animal heads on human bodies than this (without checking FurAffinity, anyway). Look at those long, stringy necks. This is horrid. I am repulsed by these creatures.

If I met an actual woman shaped like this I would scream. They all look like they've been stretched in unnatural ways. It's haunting.

The artist's comment for this piece reveals that it's actually a gift piece for a friend, but there is also a bit of passive-aggressiveness thrown in for fun. "I just had so little motivation to really get it done," DarkArtistKaiser says, "I mean yeah, a belly dancer Rouge, who wouldn't want that? I got EmperorNorton2s part of the trade, which was Rouge stuffing herself for 3 comics. Which was fine...just fine. I didn't ask for a stuffing comic, I asked for a vore comic. Somewhere along the lines he got that mixed up. Somehow. I don't even know when I kept reminding him just to make sure."

Shame on you, EmperorNorton2! Kaiser wanted VORE, not STUFFING! What an amateur mistake!!

"Nyah is Satsuki" by MilkNeko

Yeah.... yeah.



Logged into DA today and just saw this. How horrible.
Some kind of lopsided, cat/fox/dog/something person/anime thing.
Why does it have a maggot for an eye?

"Dragon muscles" by Spere94

We've featured a good few tits on this blog so far - now I think it's time we had a little something for the ladies. Providing the man-beef today is artist Spere94.


Damn, son, that's one muscular dragon. Look at all those lumps. Fortunately he's wearing a tasteful silver pouch so we don't get a face-full of dragon-shlong - though considering the amount of steroids this guy must be on I doubt it'd be too scary.

I wonder if he goes to a dragon-gym or if he just works out in his own cave; weight-lifting treasure chests n' shit. Maybe he beefed up because knights kept kicking his ass and his friends at the dragon-bar made fun of him. You show 'em, muscle-dragon!

"Salary Man Cat PAGE1 CHP1" by ClockworkKefferson

War is hell.

War really needs to be more adorable. What if, instead of guns shooting bullets, they shot feathers that brush against the enemy's neck and tickle them? That'd be kawaii as fuck! Well, something else that is kawaii as fuck is today's piece by artist ClockworkKefferson.


If there was a checklist of "things lazy Japan-obsessed teenagers put in their comics" this comic would score pretty high on it, I'll betcha. Just take a look at this shit. It's so formulaic I'm gonna bullet-point it.

• Bomb developed by Russians is called NEKO bomb
• Russians use NEKO bomb on Tokyo, it makes a giant mushroom cloud that goes NYAANN~ like the kitties in the animes do
• Everyone turns into square-headed cats

The artist's comment for this piece reads "Don't freak! I'm not a furry, neko people will appear soon in all their fetishy cuteness. xD;;;" I think they mean that the reader should not worry because they intend to soon change the focus of the comic to anime people with cat ears. Gimmie a sec.

• Focus of the comic is anime people with cat ears

F for effort, ClockworkKefferson. See me after class, you sugoi motherfucker.

"Hollow Silhouettes.x" by Thraxy-Kins

Today's first piece comes from artist Thraxy-Kins, and has the odd title Hollow Silhouettes.x


From what I can tell, it appears to be a picture of two disembodied rabbit heads with trendy haircuts sitting on some tiny hills. The one with glasses seems embarrassed. Maybe he's asking the one with no eyes if he's heard of his favorite trendy band.

The sky in the background is quite pretty but the artist has gone a little overboard on making the rabbit-heads shiny. Too much shine on hair just makes it look greasy. Though they are trendy young people... rabbit heads... so maybe the greasy look is in now? I feel so old.

"Stern Practical Pig" by naughtysmallmew

Hey, do you remember old Disney cartoons? My favourite is the one with the little pigs who build a wolf-spanking machine.


I swear to god, nine times out of ten the DeviantArt front page will have an example of someone's weirdly specific fetish. Over the last few days of starting this blog we've seen captive women, women being eaten, giant women farting onto tiny men, women being force-fed junk food until they're morbidly obese... and now I gotta come up with a bunch of words to say about a wolf-spanking machine.

Well the art's interesting, at least. I'm not sure I'm a fan of it but it's certainly got a unique look. It's a little hard to appreciate it since my eyes keep zooming in on the creepy subject matter.

Wolf-spanking? Really?

That's your thing?